A few days ago, I walked. Today, I ran, and the only thing I really have to say is “Wow, I am totally out of shape”. I’m not even sure I really made it half way before I had to start walking. It seems so weak that I can only really improve from there. Again though, I experienced the same problem as before — I was more worried about the destination than the journey itself.
See the sights. Enjoy the smells. Why are such things so difficult to do sometimes? I’m afraid I know that I still have not yet learned to let go of myself. I’m afraid that I may have to destroy myself in order to recreate myself. I don’t know why I am really afraid of that, but I am. I know I should not be scared of change — but for some reason, I still care too much. I fear the things that I may bring upon myself.
It’ll be okay though. So long as I can continue to laugh at my own predicaments, I know there is still hope. I wonder how long it will take me to unchain myself and then tear it all down. It’s been many years now…